Weekend Melancholy

I handled the events of the week quite well until yesterday. Now, the reality that I will not be teaching in another country next year has hit me, the reality that I came this close, the reality that the project that most excited me is pretty much over, that I need to start thinking about what to do with my summer & where to turn my creative/adventurous energy next...

School alone isn't doing it for me right now. It just feels like work. The students' dismal grades on their inverts test isn't helping. Nor is the anticipation of at least a few weeks of tumult as we adjust to one teacher leaving and the (probable) hiring of another, who is more than likely going to be a brand-new teachers. Nor is the fact that the laptops are falling apart, I'm sort of the person who is in charge of that project, I don't have time for it, and I hate doing it, but I know enough to be made anxious by it.

I had been very careful not to imagine next year in too much detail, not to start pinning my hopes on it, but I can't help being disappointed.